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Archive for the ‘Thoughts on Life & Writing’ Category

travelblog final copy.jpgMy alarm goes off at 4:30 am. My hand slaps towards my phone as if it is an actual clock, finally managing to silence it, if only momentarily. As a precaution I have set an alarm at 4:25, 4:35 and 4:40 lest my body goes on strike and I miss my flight (which has happened). I hate my life in those early moments of the morning, the sky is still dark and the city (whichever city it is I’m in) is still sleeping.

I’m dazed for the first few moments of whatever musical interlude I’ve chosen to jolt me out of my REM cycles and then all of a sudden my body is almost excessively alert. I sit up straight and especially of late, have a few moments of not remembering where I am.

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Wanting It All

Now and then I pace my place
I can’t retrace how I got here
I cheat the light to check my face
It’s slightly harder than last year
And all at once it gets hard to take
It gets hard to fake what I won’t be
Cause one of these days I’ll be born and raised
And it’s such a waste to grow up lonely
– John Mayer, from Born and Raised

The “Science for Arts Students” program at McGill University was a series of classes completely lacking in any sort of academic rigor or credibility as a learning experience. Instead of being insulted by the low value the science department placed on the left hemispheres of our brains, we rejoiced in the opportunity to add a few empty credits on to a reading/paper saturated courseload.  (more…)

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IMG_4759Exactly a year ago today, I was up till 4am Eastern Standard Time, battling two bursting suitcases. I was yanking out random clothing and possessions, discarding a few items at random and re-stuffing the baggage, till finally both weighed less than 23 kilograms. I collapsed into an exhausted sleep, dreams of logistics, unsold furniture, pending accounts, and unreturned cable boxes haunting my dreams.

The next morning was a strange one – I did things I’d normally do on a day off: brunch, Shoppers Drugmart (I weep for all my unused Optimum points) and some last minute banking stuff. But by early afternoon I arrived at Toronto Pearson with exactly 46 kilograms of checked baggage, the maximum carryon allowance, and one very unhappy cat.
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Papa

5 years ago I got a message in the middle of the night. It was not good news.

I had never lost someone close to me (at 28 that made me pretty lucky), and the grief was surprising in it’s intensity. We all called him Papa: my parents, aunts, uncles, and cousins. My Grandfather had been called that for as long as I can remember. (more…)

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I have this crazy superstition that the way I spend New Year’s Eve, dictates how my year will go. It has happened a few times, so it has sort of stuck with me through the years.

On New Year’s Eve 2007, my friend Tandi and I roamed the streets of Manhattan all night, avoiding creepy strangers, bursting into giggles at the slightest provocation, searching for the bar of all bars (as defined by Tandi): Double Happiness.

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I’ve been in Delhi for about a month now. As I write this, a stray ant crawls across the floor of my bedroom. I barely notice them anymore; they are now a part of my daily existence. Two or three grace my shower every morning. I try not to kill them but there is no way to warn an ant that they are about to be drowned, so I’ve had my share of casualties (sorry).

Speaking of showers, I know we are lucky to have water through my mother’s very persistent pursuit of the water company. We got water just in time to not move out of our house for a few days.

The power will go off between three and five times each day, but this is also okay. The generators are much better than they were when I was a kid and now run air-conditioning. Back then, the outages were longer, and in June when it was 42 degrees Celsius outside, the only thing we could do was lie still because moving just made you hotter.  (more…)

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Failure is defined by the Mirriam-Webster dictionary as “omission of occurrence or performance” (specifically a duty or action), “a state of inability to perform a normal function” or “a fracturing or giving way under stress”.

It has a few other definitions involving bankruptcy, deterioration and the very profound “one that has failed”, but I’d like to take a moment to consider the first few meanings.  (more…)

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